Raw Drip

(WARNING: I’ve violated my own “no politics” policy in the following post.  If you like my writing enough that you wish to remain blissfully ignorant of my political views, then I suggest you cruise by in a couple of days for more of the usual.  Otherwise, read on loyal drips, and thank you.)

September 6, 2008

Dearest Tabitha,

Yesterday I overheard two 30-something women in the ladies restroom discussing their political views and the upcoming presidential election.  Woman #1 claimed that she had no strong feelings about either of our presidential contenders.  Woman #2 was clearly in the “I hate John McCain, but I hate Obama even more” camp.  Between the echoed tinkling of urine streaming into the toilet bowls, woman #1 & woman #2 reached an agreement on one thing: they are both going to vote for McCain because his running mate is a woman, Sarah Palin.   Both women spoke of how they had very limited knowledge of McCain’s stance on most of the issues, and yet both claimed that they knew all they needed to know about Sarah Palin’s stance on the issues from the latest copy of People magazine. 

“I’ll bet she’s the first VP we’ve had in a while who can hunt, kill, dress, cook & serve dinner!”, one of them said.

“Well, it’s about time we got a woman in the White House.  I don’t care if she can hunt or not, she’s a woman so she’s got my vote!”, said the other one.

Why am I writing a letter to tell you about an overheard conversation in a ladies restroom?  It’s because that conversation scared the crap out of me and for the first time in my life, I was more scared for you and your generation than I was for my own.  Okay, so I’ve spent the past 4 years in a constant state of fear - worrying first about your brother, and then about you.  Your every little need is of concern to me and your father and we strive to meet all them all of the time.  In fact, I think it’s because your daddy and I are always “in the weeds” trying to satisfy all of the demands of parenting that we lose our perspective from time to time.  But this restroom conversation was just the jolt I needed to be reminded of all that’s at stake in this election for everyone, but especially for you, my dearest daughter.

Here’s the thing - I’m not afraid for your future because two women want to elect an ultra-conservative female politician to our nation’s highest office.  What I am afraid of is the fact that these women were very clear - they’re going to vote for Sarah Palin (not John McCain) and they’re doing so first, and foremost, because she’s a woman.  For them, “it’s about time we had a woman in the White House” is reason enough for them to cast their vote in McCain & Palin’s favor. 

When I hear men say that they’re NOT voting for McCain because his running mate is a woman, I’m forced to consider the flawed logic of my anonymous restroom pals, as well.  Both stances are equally ignorant, speaking to a thought process devoid of anything even remotely resembling intellectual rigor.  Not only is it offensive, it’s worrisome as well.  Rather than strive to raise the level of political discourse, many of my fellow women are fit to settle for a version of gender equality that results from lowering themselves to the same narrow-minded, sexist views notoriously held by so many of our pig-headed male counterparts.  Casting something so precious as your vote - your voice in the political process - soley based on something as superficial as gender is hardly dignifying the legacy of our forebearer’s sacrifices.  In fact, I’d venture to say that there are suffragists rolling in their graves listening to this kind of logic!   

I fear that my generation has become complacent.  If the two 30-somethings I overheard the other day are the tip of an iceberg, then many of my generation no longer see our human right to exercise choice in the voting booth, in the bedroom, or in the workplace as a power that comes with tremendous responsibilities; responsibilities that require thoughtful analysis and careful consideration.  Instead, as I listened to the anonymous female voters verbally cast their ballots based on a profile in People magazine, it occurred to me that the only thing they’ve really done is to cast aside their right to participate meaningfully in the political process, instead settling for the mere ability to participate at all.  That’s not how you exercise the right of choice. That’s how you walk out with an “I Voted” sticker on your lapel.

Whatever the outcome of the election this November, I just want you to know, dearest daughter, that some of us didn’t make our decisions lightly.  We tried to be active participants who read the lengthy articles in all of the different newspapers to obtain a more balanced perspective of our choices,  We tempered the media’s analysis with our own life experience and threw in a bit of judgement for good measure.  It wasn’t easy.  It was time-consuming and, for some of us, it was hard to turn our backs on such a momentous opportunity - to elect a woman Vice President - but it was a beautiful burden to bear. 

It would be nice to wrap up my letter to you with a famous woman’s quote, but in the spirit of equality, I’ll quote a famous man here.  Winston Churchill once said, “The price of greatness is responsibility.”  So true.

Do me a favor and own your greatness, okay? 

I Love You,

Mom

The Disease: Parenthood

The Symptoms:

• An inability to sleep for longer than 4 to 6 hours at a time
• Confusion
• General irritability
• Confusion
• Irrational worry
• Clairvoyance
• Rapid mood swings
• A propensity for snot encrusted apparel
• A vague odor often described as a mix of sweaty kid stink mixed with stale urine, Ivory soap, and chocolate milk

Treatment Options:
The regular application of a childcare professional is strongly advised in those hardest hit with this insidious affliction. There is no known cure for this disease, but some psychotropic drugs have been known to provide temporary relief from the symptoms.

As I recuperate from yet another nasty illness this year, I’ve had some time to sit around and “heal” with my laptop by my side for distraction.  Naturally, this leads to mindless web surfing, which usually leads to visits to all of my “favorites” - those favorite bookmarked sites in my web browser. 

Here are some of my favorites that I thought were worth sharing:

Auction Site:  Housing Works Auctions

Housing Works is a charitable organization combating the dual tragedies of HIV/AIDS & homelessness.  What better way to support their ambitious goals than to shop at their thrift stores next time you find yourself in New York City?  Or, airfare being what it is, save your money and shop from home!  Housing Works has an awesome online auction so you can bid on some beautifully beneficial booty while seated on your beautiful booty. 

Now, when I say “thrift store”, I don’t mean stores filled with the mothball smelling discarded crap merchandise like old coffee mugs and raggedy Old Navy tees.  If that’s what you’re looking for, go to Goodwill.  The stuff on the Housing Works site is the good stuff.  Somehow they comb through all the crap and manage to find only the top-notch merchandise for their site.  Typical finds include last season’s Jimmy Choo pumps still in their original box, vintage couture handbags from the likes of Chanel, Gucci, & Louis Vuitton, collectible art work & books, and interesting cultural artifacts from all over the world.   While I may not be able to afford to expand my handbag collection at my local Saks, I can definitely afford to splurge here and there on some lightly used designer accessories while supporting a good cause.  Check it out and you’ll find yourself adding this site to your favorites, as well!

Baby Clothing:  Wry Baby

While message tees may be on Glamour’s “out” list, I think they still work for tykes.  Besides, as a parent, what better way to express your perspectives on life than by swathing my innocent infant in provocative message tees?   If you were to wear the same tee shirt, you’d have belligerent a**holes calling you out all over town, but put it on your kid and there’s just something cuter about that “Republicans Suck” tee shirt.

Children’s Bookstore: MoMA Store

I know.  It’s not too surprising to find a former NYC resident extolling the virtues of MoMA.  I have to admit that their online store is a great place to find interesting and unusual merchandise.  But my very favorite thing about this long-time favorite is the wonderful children’s book collection.  Many of the books featured are modern classics and many are just wonderful, off-the-wall stories that are vibrantly illustrated.  Whatever you’re looking for, if you’d like it to entertain and stimulate your brain as much as your children’s, check out this site’s amazing selections.